RE: a DAY AT THE SPA….can you write an amusing tale that includes at least 5 of these lines?

This is just for the pure fun of being creative…nothing more,nothing less,my friends.

1. My hair is thinning,my nails are cracking and I think I’m becoming addicted to ________.
2. He’s even more sarcastic than Dr. House.
3. That nail color reminds me of __________.
4. No magazines or idle talk….I’ll take a TALL glass of Asti Spumante,if you please.
5. EKKKKKKKKE !!! The cockroach from hell is doing the backstroke in the jacuzzi !!!
6. OMG!!!! _________ just walked in and he’s looking at me!!!
7. And then my shrink told me: _________________.
8. Doo wah diddy diddy.
9. Dahhhhhhhhling……I need something to jazz up my life.
10. The gossip-mongers will have a FIELD DAY with this !!

X 1. My hair is thinning,my nails are cracking and I think I’m becoming addicted to ________.
2. He’s even more sarcastic than Dr. House.
X 3. That nail color reminds me of __________.
X 4. No magazines or idle talk….I’ll take a TALL glass of Asti Spumante,if you please.
X 5. EKKKKKKKKE !!! The cockroach from hell is doing the backstroke in the jacuzzi !!!
6. OMG!!!! _________ just walked in and he’s looking at me!!!
X 7. And then my shrink told me: _________________.
X 8. Doo wah diddy diddy.
X 9. Dahhhhhhhhling……I need something to jazz up my life.
10. The gossip-mongers will have a FIELD DAY with this !!

Our day off began well enough. “[9] Dahhhhhhhhling… I need something to jazz up my life,” said my wife, Buttercup.

I c-cked an eyebrow. I’d thought that chasing down injured tourists in an ambulance, her job, which I shared with her a couple of nights a week, was jazzy enough. “I love it when you talk like Eva Gabor. Whatcha have in mind?”

“Spa,” she said brightly. Oh boy. The little town of Rusty Spring was filled with New Agey tourist traps — “bathe in the healing waters of the…” and all that nonsense. She saw my quick frown, and echoed it with one of her own. “We’re going.”

…and that was that. Within minutes we were at “Parisienne Jackson’s Lourdes Grotto Spa And Pool.”

“Jacuzzi room,” said Buttercup to the attendant, who resembled her so closely they could have been sisters.

We stepped into the room. “[5] EEKKKKKKKK!!! The cockroach from hell is doing the backstroke in the jacuzzi!!!” shrieked the attendant, turning a whiter shade of pale.

“We’ll go to the pool,” said Buttercup quickly.

The pool was shallow, for sitting and soaking, not for swimming. The water was rusty red, of course, being from the spring which gave the town its name. It was occupied by a half dozen townies and a half dozen tourists. Elder Lopez motioned us to come on in. “Well, if it isn’t the ambulance Sinclairs!” she said, beaming.

I did not correct her. Somehow, “ambulance Tamers” sounded weird. I noticed that she hadn’t brought her Post cane into the pool, although it was close at hand poolside. Not for the first time, I wondered how the heck the town had gotten five Post canes, when it wasn’t even in the right part of the world to have one.

One of the tourists said, “… [7] And then my shrink told me, I should get out more.”

I stepped into the water. COLD!!! Brrrr! “I got your shrinkage right here!” I blurted out. Buttercup gave me her dangerous look.

Robin, the Elder’s half-wit great-grandson, surfaced in the middle of the pool, wearing his SCUBA gear. “[8] Doo wah diddy diddy” went the bubbles from his regulator. He disappeared under the murky waters again.

“How are you?” Buttercup politely asked Elder Lopez.

“[1] My hair is thinning, my nails are cracking, and I think I’m becoming addicted to Asti Spumante,” said the viejita. She motioned to the pool’s attendant, Parisienne Jackson herself. “[4] No magazines or idle talk… I’ll take a TALL glass of Asti Spumante, if you please,” said Elder Lopez.

“Coming right up,” replied Mrs. Jackson.

“[3] That nail color reminds me of clamato,” I told Mrs. Jackson. “I’ll have a clamato. 99% clam-free!”

Hotel Saket plaza Mahabaleshwar – Book Online

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